Nani Mshukiwa Mkuu Katika Kifo Hiki?

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Mid-adult African man taking shower.

Mwanaume unaamka asubui kama umeingia bafu, unapiga luku yako safi then ukienda kutoka unapata mama liam amekuandalia mapocho pocho, something that you didn’t expect since you haven’t been in good terms with her for a while. Lakini juu umechelewa meeting, unamwambia akufungie takeaway utakulia mbele. Ukifika kwa gari una text kasungwa “Good morning love, ndio natoka home sai I’m on my way. Tengeneza chai nakuja na kitafunio.” Then unaanza safari moja kwa moja hadi mahali pema moyoni.
Ukifika mawindoni unapata kasungwa pia naye amekuandalia mapocho pocho. Unamuuliza niaje ameamua kupika pancakes kwa wingi ilhali ulikua usha mwambia unakuja na kitafunio, unaskia amekuuliza “Uliniambia sangapi na nimeshinda na simu sijaona. Ata nilikua nimekutext upitie supa uchukuwe Air freshener na lime na huku reply”. Ukienda kuangalia simu yako unapa missed call 74 na zote niza mama Liam. Ukifungua message,, Waaaaaaaaaaaaaiiii Waaaaaaaaaaaaaiiii Waaaaaaaaaaaaaiiii mailood, is William Ruto a living thing!!!
Badala ya kutumia kasungwa message kumbe ulitumia Mama Liam. To make the matter worse, aliamuka asubuhi kuwa tengenezea vitafunio,,, wuueh!!! Not knowing what has happened, kasungwa anakuuliza “Beb na hizi mahamri ni tutamu, umezibuy wapi?” Inabidi umemwambia hutaki maswali za kiupuzi, kwani haoni nyumba yako inataka kuporomoka. Then she starts to get furious with those sentiments, anaanza drama sasa. She tries to snatch your phone from you, apo sasa inabidi umemkula hedi ya kimataifa hadi nundu inatokea kwa forehead.
Anapiga nduru majirani wanakuja rescue mission, kasungwa akiulizwa nini mbaya unaskia amesema “sini huyu mwanaume ananipiga” ata kabla hajamaliza kuelezea, kasungwa anaanguka chini na kuanza kutoa povu kwa mdomo. Within few seconds kasungwa anakata roho,, Eloi Eloi kwani namna gani. Before you know it, DCI is already at the crime scene “Kichana umeamua kuuwa msichana ya wenyewe”. kufumba na kufumbua unajikuta rumande, postmortem inasema cause of death ni food poisoning. Kumbe that fateful morning mama Liam alikua amepanga kukumalisaa. Daah, ama kweli mtego hunasa waliokuwepo na wasiokuwepo.
Mama Liam out of luck, she finessed two birds with one stone. Upon hearing that the cause of death was poison, you start to accuse mama Liam for the murder. During hearing you’re asked;

Judge: We mzee, so you’re saying it’s you wife who killed her?

Baba Liam: Yes you honour

Judge: How did she do that?

Baba Liam: She poisoned her.

Judge: So she gave you the poisoned mahamri to take it to her?

Baba Liam: No your honour, the mahamris were meant for me.

Judge: So how did the mahamri ended up at victims house?

Baba Liam: I went with them since my wife had packed them for me to eat at work.

Judge: So your wife didn’t know that you were heading to the victim’s place?

Baba Liam: Yes your honour.

Judge: So she had no intention of harming her or even aware about her existence. Right?

Baba Liam: Yes your honour.

Judge: How can you convince me that you didn’t put poison in mahamris on your way to the victim’s place?

Baba Liam: Your honour i loved kasungwa so much, i can never harm her.

Judge: Her neighbors said they heard the victim screaming for help & before she collapse she told them that ulikua umempiga hedi ya kimataifa. True or false?

Baba Liam: I can explain your honour.

Judge: Okay, explain to me how mama Liam packed for you the Nundu that you installed on the victim’s forehead as shown in these affidavit?

Baba Liam: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaiiii Ruto must go!!!

Hii ni kama ndrama ni kama vindiooo, lakini Mimi kwa maoni yangu kulingana na ushahidi, nikiulizwa ni nani mshukiwa mkuu katika kifo hiki?

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