How To Quit A Toxic Relationship


Once you realize that your relationship is toxic, then you should take steps to either address the toxicity or quit the relationship.

Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.
Proverbs 22: 24-25

Quitting a relationship with someone you are still in love with is not an easy task and it is not something that can be done in an instant, but the process of quitting the relationship should be commenced immediately it becomes so glaring that quitting is the only way to get back your sanity. Download IYEF Social app on Google playstore and get more updates.

Some people feel helplessly trapped in toxic relationships because of some of the following reasons.

  1. Damaged Esteem: When you have been beaten and battered in a toxic relationship, it is easy to have low self-esteem of yourself and you begin to feel you aren’t good enough to find another worthy lover. Then you keep believing that your toxic lover will change some day.
  2. Financial Dependence: Most of the people especially ladies who get trapped in toxic relationship are trapped because they are financially dependent on their partners. So they think they will not survive if they quit the toxic relationship.
  3. Sexual Attachment: Sexual ties is another reason why some people remain stuck in an abusive and toxic relationship. I have witnessed a case where a man was constantly abusing a lady and people were always fighting the man in defence of the lady. At night however, the lady will go back to the man for sex, and then in the day, they are fighting again. This is one of the reason why sex is greatly discouraged in relationships.
  4. Pregnancy/Child: Some people get trapped in toxic relationship because they are already pregnant or have a child with the toxic partner. This is more common with ladies as they fear to cater for the pregnancy or child all alone and coupled with the shame that comes from such premarital baggage.


Once you have identified the reason why you are stuck in the toxic relationship, then you can take the following steps to begin the process of quitting the relationship.

  1. Be real to yourself about the toxicity of the relationship; don’t find excuse to justify the toxic behaviours of your partner.
  2. Confide in a trusted friend and discuss your plans to quit.
  3. If you can’t pull through with your decision, then talk to a counselor, pastor or psychologist for help.
  4. Take steps to rebuild your lost esteem and focus on the good values you have as a person.
  5. If finance is the major reason why you are stuck in the relationship, then try to work harder and save up some money in preparation to quit.
  6. If pregnancy or a baby is the anchor in the toxic relationship, then brace up and discuss with your parents/guardian for possible support.
  7. After all these, call/text your partner and announce your exit from the relationship or you gradually leave him/her before the announcement.
  8. Cry! Cry!! Cry!!! If you need to cry, do it and ease your pains. Crying is a good psychological way to cure your heart. Women are particularly blessed with this trait.
  9. Set your boundaries and cut off communication with the toxic person.
  10. Find your hobbies and get busy in doing what makes you happy as you rebuild yourself.
  11. Take all the time you need to heal completely before you get into another relationship

Remember to make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.

Am I ready to bear this pain and toxicity in my relationship for the rest of my life?

PRAYER: Lord, I receive strength in my inner man to walk out of the toxic relationship that treats me less than you value me.


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