Opinion: Listen up, Men! The woman you are begging is begging another man

Here’s a truth that many don’t want to admit, but it’s time you face it: if you truly knew how easily that woman you’re bending over backward for—the one you’re spending your time, money, and energy trying to impress—was giving herself to another man, you’d be furious. In fact, if you understood the reality, you’d probably lock yourself up and give yourself a wake-up call.

This isn’t about cynicism; it’s about seeing things clearly. No woman is difficult to get if she’s interested. That woman you’re working so hard to win over? She’s out there giving her time, her attention, and even her loyalty to someone who hasn’t done half of what you’re doing. Why? Because he’s the one she’s choosing. When a woman has her eyes set on a man, she’ll move mountains to be with him. She’ll rearrange her life, her priorities, and even compromise, because, for her, he’s worth it. Meanwhile, here you are, trying to buy her love, thinking that if you do just a little bit more, she’ll finally see your worth.

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Courtesy photo
Courtesy photo

But the hard truth? Women are never as difficult as they make themselves out to be. If she’s playing hard to get, dragging you through hoops, and constantly making you feel like you’re not enough, it’s because she’s simply not interested. The reality is, when a woman is truly into a man, there’s no game. There’s no need to chase, no mind games, and no questioning where you stand. She’ll be there, just as interested, just as willing, and just as eager to build something real.

Men waste years chasing women who are out of reach, thinking they’ll eventually “win her over.” But the truth is, if she’s not choosing you, she’s simply keeping you around for the benefits, the attention, and the resources. She knows she’s not going to commit, but she enjoys the luxury of your efforts. You’re just another option in her life, another backup plan, while she’s giving herself fully to the man who doesn’t even need to try. Think about it—does that sound like respect? Does that sound like a worthwhile investment of your time and energy?

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Be wise. Don’t waste your time, money, and emotions on a woman who treats you like an option. A man who values himself doesn’t chase after someone who doesn’t value him in return. It’s not worth it, and there’s no honor in suffering for someone who has already made it clear that they’re not interested.

Shift your energy. Redirect your focus on becoming the best version of yourself. A man who builds himself, who knows his worth, doesn’t need to chase after anyone. When you’re on your grind, when you’re focused on your goals and your growth, the right people will naturally gravitate toward you. You won’t have to convince anyone of your value, because your value will speak for itself.

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Be wise. Stop running after women who don’t see your worth, and put that energy into your own life. Build yourself, grow your potential, and watch how people start to respect and recognize you for who you are, not for what you can do for them. You deserve someone who chooses you, someone who sees your worth without you having to prove it over and over again. And remember, a man with self-respect doesn’t chase anyone who isn’t chasing him back.

Aklahyel Goni

Mil

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